Goodbye Paula

Paula Morgan died on Sunday. The news hit me like a fist in the chest. Paula's family lived on our block for many years. Paula was six when my family moved here. She was one of the neighborhood little girls who played on the swing sets in our backyards. She ate ice cream from the ice cream truck with my daughter and the other neighborhood kids. I watched Paula grow from a little girl to a young lady before her family moved away.

She struggled as a young adult, as young adults often do. She moved back into her mother's house and brought her young son with her. Early Sunday morning someone set fire to her mother's house. Paula's mother was out of town. Paula and her little boy were inside. Nicholas got out safely. Paula didn't make it. Now her mom is grieving the loss of her only daughter and her home.

This wasn't a tragic accident. Someone murdered Paula Morgan. Someone deliberately destroyed her mother's home. I can't believe this is real. In the middle of my grief is a coiled spring of anger. Police have a suspect in custody. But it doesn't undo the damage.

Paula who ate potato chips during the block party. Who I handed a Coke and a Popsicle. Who I talked to and laughed with. That Paula. Our Paula. Someone killed her on purpose! I don't understand. Why would anyone do that? Even if I knew why it wouldn't make any sense. Making sense of nonsense is hard to do.

Today is Paula's birthday. She would have been 25. I'm remembering her today.

Happy birthday Paula. I'm glad I got to know you when you were little. I close my eyes and I still see you smile.  You taught us to live life, laugh and have fun. Thanks for that. It matters. I'm sorry your light was taken from the world. It's a little darker without you shining here. Goodbye Paula Rae. Rest in peace.

Paula Rae Morgan

 July 23 1987 -- July 22 2012