I had one of Those days.
Diabetes kicked me in the pants today. That low happened while I was sleeping. Of course it did. I woke up covered in sweat and feeling terrible. So, I got up and had breakfast. That's when the fun really started. My Dexcom looks like this today...
I'm feeling beaten down by it all. I feel miserable with my blood sugar going up, down, sideways and hauling me along with it. I feel as out of control as that graph looks. As I was looking at the graph, I realized it reminded me of a conductor's baton. Going up and down in various beats. What if Diabetes had a score. What would it sound like?
Today, my diabetes would sound like this:
When I woke up I felt like this:
When I couldn't stop the high blood sugar all (insert swearing) morning, I felt like this:
And of course, in the afternoon, when I hit the perfect sweet spot...
I felt like THIS!!!!! (Please, scroll to 3:00 and let er rip to the end!)
Look, no one lights off fireworks, throws confetti, or blows off cannons in celebration of a 100, (even though they should!) So I put the 1812 Overture on my iPod and enjoyed it. 100 feels great. And happens way less often than I would like.
Today was so frustrating because I always want my diabetes to be under control. I want to feel like this about my diabetes:
But right now...
Here we go again!!!!! Man, I hate it. I feel like this...
Just when I think I have things under control, everything goes to hell. All day I'd go up for no apparent reason. Or down. Or back up. I feel like the 2nd movement of Beethoven's 9th. The music of diabetes cycles back to loud and beyond my control. Today I feel torn up like one of Honey's chew toys and way too tired. Tough day with diabetes. I can't beat it so I might as well groove with it.
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Diabetes Set to Music
Labels:
Burnout,
Cello,
Diabetes,
Fighting Back,
Fun,
Music,
Self-Acceptance
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
wow - what a ride - the music really brings it all home. Sorry you had a bad day and I hope it is all JLW tomorrow. Hugs
ReplyDeleteThanks. I hate days like this. Tomorrow will be better. I hope.
DeleteI totally understand how you feel! On Saturday I had 2 readings of 46, then a 39, then a 343...within hours of each other. THAT doesn't feel so hot lol. But hang in there...you are doing so well!
ReplyDeleteIt feels like being a yo-yo. I fear going way high after a low, so I try to follow the rule of 15's. As in, eat 15 grams of carbs and watch my blood sugar go 15 points lower... Sigh! This is hard. Glad we're in this together.
Delete" I can't beat it so I might as well groove with it." I love that! I'm sorry you had such a rollercoaster-y time, but what a great attitude to have about it!
ReplyDelete(And thanks for the hundy shoutout.) :)
Kim, your Hundy cracked me up, as do all of your cartoons. Keep making them. I love them. Sometimes all we can do is groove and laugh.
Delete